Sharing Stories

Twice a month, Maryville Chaplain Melissa McCoy reaches for her beautiful olive wood bowl. She uses it each month to designate who is speaking. 

As the elegant, handcrafted bowl is passed around the circle, from one set of hands to another, the faces of many different women either look up from the bowl or look deep into the bowl, staring at its intricate grain pattern, as they share their stories. The women are Maryville residents who come together as a group, where women ages 54 to 101 gather to share with one another and fill their own proverbial cup.  

As Melissa McCoy explained, “We pass this beautiful bowl around, and each woman fills it with their stories.”  

Melissa is the chaplain at Maryville. While the nurses and caregivers care for the residents’ health needs, Melissa is one of the Maryville team members who helps to care for their spiritual and emotional needs.  

Maryville is a sponsored ministry of the Sisters of St. Mary of Oregon and has been providing “Service with Love” to the community since 1963. Caring for the sick in the Tualatin Valley has been ingrained by the Sisters for more than 100 years. As Melissa explained it, “The Sisters answer needs in the community. We literally are a campus that supports people from birth until death. There is this quote that says from affinity to infinity, and in between is this place of love. That’s what I think of Maryville – that place of love in-between.” 

The Sisters’ legacy of compassion continues today in Melissa’s bimonthly women’s group. During the challenging isolation of the COVID-19 pandemic, she began to notice a growing need. 

“Many of the women said, ‘I have grief, and I don’t know what to do with it,’” Melissa said. “Our first meeting was five ladies, our second meeting was twelve, and our third meeting was seventeen.”
  
Now the residents cannot wait for the next meeting. At each session, drinks and snacks are enjoyed as Melissa reads poetry and leads the group in weekly reflections, storytelling and sharing, often following a theme or idea. This month, the ladies are sharing some favorite holiday memories and some of their cultural and religious traditions. 

Despite cultural differences, diverse backgrounds, mobility and physical challenges and memory loss, you can see joy and delight on the faces of the women who attend the Maryville women’s group. It is their opportunity to share their personal memories and stories with other women and a way to grow closer by caring for one another. 
  
“We laugh a lot!” said Melissa, who said the women also abide by rules to honor and respect their differences and needs. “We love each other in our entirety. They are all so graceful and beautiful with each other when someone needs more time to talk. They all feel heard, honored, respected and held.” 

Aging is a challenging part of life that can bring new sadness and grief as bodies and families change. Making space for those emotions and honoring the memory of what was lost bring new purpose and hope to the women at Maryville. 

“Grief does not just mean losing a loved one,” McCoy explained. “It is so important for us to fully listen to each story and let each person share and ruminate so we can hold it. It is part of the human experience. We need to tell our stories.” 

Thanks to the care and support from caring staff like Melissa, Maryville continues to be a place where, regardless of faith, disability or age, the well-being of its residents remains the first priority. If you asked her though, she would tell you she is the one who is really benefiting.  

“I feel very honored to listen to these ladies and hold their stories because really you only share your story with someone who has earned it,” Melissa said. “They are sharing their stories with me, which is a huge privilege, and I am humbled by it. They are teaching me how to age beautifully.”

Uplift lives with a gift to the Annual Fund

At Maryville, your loved ones receive ‘Service with Love’ through skilled nursing and compassionate care. This has been the mission of the Sisters of St. Mary of Oregon since 1963.

Your gift to the Annual Fund uplifts the lives of Maryville residents, their families and caregivers. 

Give to the Annual Fund today.

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